The View From The Beach Chair

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(From an undisclosed tropical location) 

Well, I must say the immediate veiw is pretty spectacular.  Azure waters, string bikinis, beach volleyball with some coeds who seem to have forgotton to go home.  (Oh Carlos, would you please bring me another Mojito?  There's a good chap.)

Sadly, the news Stateside isn't quite as sunny.  Breezy, yes.  Sunny, no.  El Presidente' has managed to usher his second of the Big Three automakers into bankruptcy reorganization.  I've no doubt the brain trust at the UAW is simply giddy over that one.  I can't wait to see the new contract negotiations.

(Thank you, Carlos.  Could you please bring us a menu? Splendid.)

Another abortionist has been assassinated.  Ah, this is just so tedious.  Why can't people comprehend the fact that killing your baby in-utero is every woman's Government given right?  Seriously, isn't industry stressed enough at present?  Can't we all just get along?

Speaking of industry, it looks like El Presidente' is taking over Citigroup for good (note to self, have accountant dump T-Bills, pronto).  When I read that I laughed so loudly I scared some of those silly little birds that are always pecking in the surf.  Riiiight.  This guy quadruples the Federal deficit, and he's going to manage a major financial conglomerate.  His Treasury Secretary couldn't even manage his own taxes.  This is better than a Marx Brothers movie.  Come to think of it, this is a Marx Brothers movie.  The other Marx.

And what is with the unGodly weather up there in the Northern Tier?  Frost warnings in Upstate New York?  In June?  I hear it will be a balmy 60 something in Minneapolis tomorrow.  There will be precious few string bikinis at Lake Calhoun, I'll wager.

(Thank you, Carlos.  I'll have the crab-stuffed mushrooms.  We'll take an order of loaded nachos as well.  And another round of Mojitos.  Ole!)

Yes, El Presidente' is going to have more trouble than he expectss elling his carbon tax scam with all the little people freezing their asses off.  Maybe he and the wife can discuss tactics on their next $24,000 date in NYC.  Then again, maybe his new masters in Beijing will relieve him of that odious little task.

Well food's here.  On to more pressing matters.

 

 

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Barthélemy Barbancourt
At least Kemrit has the right attitude
written by Il Duce’ , June 01, 2009

I wanted to get the "Welcome to the Island" Post up today but work got in the way. You know how those 14971 Risk Management issues for legacy products just seem to never go away.

Anyway, I was figuring Ben would be the drink fetcher, but I see that his job has been outsourced. I guess we'll just have to assign Ben the job of dishwasher. How do you wash out these coconuts they keep serving me my Pina Coladas in?



0
...
written by Kermit , June 01, 2009

With rum.


Badda
Washing Coconuts
written by Badda , June 01, 2009

Put more booze in them... the booze cleans the coconut while it refreshes the drinker.


Sequel
Washing Coconuts
written by Sequel , June 01, 2009

Something about the vision of Ben in the apron washing coconuts with rum makes me laugh.
Make him speak in a fake accent, and answer to "Carlos".



0
...
written by Kermit , June 01, 2009

Si, Sequel.


Sequel
Washing Coconuts
written by Sequel , June 01, 2009

Maybe not Carlos...
hmmm.

Chico!
Yeah, that's the ticket!



0
14971 Risk Management
written by K-Rod , June 01, 2009

That's why I prefer working on new product over legacy, Duce'.


Try not to distract the young Chico, he has more drinks to serve.



Ben
actually...
written by Ben , June 01, 2009

I'm back to being a soccer ref so I'm not looking for employment. Have I mentioned that I hate you all lately?


Ben
and sequel...
written by Ben , June 01, 2009

nice vauge SNL Jon Lovitz (sp?) refrence. Don't ask, I know a lot of random pop culture shit...


Ben
How do you wash out these coconuts they keep serving me my Pina Coladas in?
written by Ben , June 01, 2009

with my urine smilies/smiley.gif


0
Besides, every woman knows
written by MoonliteSonata , June 01, 2009

that Carlos is a beautiful young latino cabana boy (preferrably mute) who wears nothing but cutoffs, toolbelt, beautiful white teeth and a really great tan. The straight version of Agador (the Birdcage), if you will.


auntypsychotic
"Ever notice ...?" (andy rooney did not live in vein)
written by auntypsychotic , June 01, 2009

" Why can't people comprehend the fact that killing your baby in-utero is every woman's Government given right? "
I'm not trying to get THIS debate started again, we all know how it will go and where it will end. Freedom of choice vs. right to life ending in a draw.
Just wanted to share an observation though; I have noticed that many of those who are against abortion are also the same people who tend to favor capital punishment. I guess it all depends on what end one prefers to do their culling.

(Moon and I skew the survey results by being both pro-choice and pro-death penalty.)



auntypsychotic
gratuitous swipe at ben's (still) fictional sex life
written by auntypsychotic , June 01, 2009

" Have I mentioned that I hate you all lately? "
No, but thanks. It's good to know that your still thinking of us. BTW did you get that puncture patch kit for your "date"?



auntypsychotic
we saw carlos first
written by auntypsychotic , June 01, 2009

" ... who wears nothing but cutoffs ... "
VERY small cutoffs.



Ben
pro-choice pro death penalty...
written by Ben , June 01, 2009

im here, but even though I'm virtually split on the abortion issue (for "right" but against roe v. wade) I believe we need to use the death penalty A LOT more. Simple solution to prison overcrowding.


A Non Y Mouse
What's Ben wearing in your fantasy Kermit?
written by A Non Y Mouse , June 02, 2009

I think Moon, Aunty and I would like to know. Does he do pedicures as well as fetch cocktails?


Sequel
with my urine
written by Sequel , June 02, 2009

See Chico, it's just that kind of bitterness in the service industry that makes getting good help so hard.
Now back to the coconuts.



0
No Ben on my beach
written by Kermit , June 02, 2009

Il Duce put him there. Carlos is there to fetch me drinks and nosh. He knows not to block my view of the beach volleyball pit.


Ben
service industry...
written by Ben , June 02, 2009

yea, my last employee moment in the service industry was me telling one of my bosses and I quote, "to go fuck yourself and rot in hell." So yea...


auntypsychotic
...
written by auntypsychotic , June 03, 2009

"I think Moon, Aunty and I would like to know. Does he do pedicures as well as fetch cocktails?"

Still waiting for that answer.



auntypsychotic
promises, promises
written by auntypsychotic , June 03, 2009

Mousedelic honey,
I can live without the pedicures if he is fluent in "other things".
Years ago I promised Moon a "well-built, mute latino boy named Carlos" as a "houseboy". The deal is off, however, because she installed Chris before I could implement my master plan (which involved buying a young one and raising him in the basement).
I still have to use one of the dark, dank rooms in the basement to build her "Mistress Moon's Gothic Playpen". May have to wait til we buy our own digs next year.




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